8 Reasons I Stopped Reading Your Damn Book

I used to try to finish books, no matter what. Dune cured me of that. And Wheel of Time is definitely under #4 – The Long Con.

Bare Knuckle Writer

IMG_1415 #9: No T-Rex Skulls. (Image by Steph Snow)

1. The Snake Mittens. A book I tried reading recently–which seemed perfect for me–got the axe because the main character failed to notice three important things in the first ten pages, all because he was too busy wondering how he looked in his new hat. You don’t deserve to survive to the end of the story. You are dumber than snake mittens. Next.

2. The Failure To Launch. Nothing’s happening. And I don’t mean the artistic nothing, where you can get alongside it because it’s exploring character*. I mean nothing nothing. You might have some good characters or an interesting setting or a cool idea, but, goddamn, move it along a little. I’m too busy to hang around while an author masturbates all over a page and calls it art.

3. The Frankly Scarlett**. When you just don’t give two sacks…

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Celtic Fairies, Fables, and Folklore! Bestselling author (top #100 Amazon Canada, #1 in Paranormal Fantasy, Amazon Canada) Christy Nicholas, also known as Green Dragon, is an author, artist and accountant. After she failed to become an airline pilot, she quit her ceaseless pursuit of careers that begin with 'A', and decided to concentrate on her writing. Since she has Project Completion Disorder, she is one of the few authors with NO unfinished novels. Christy has her hands in many crafts, including digital art, beaded jewelry, writing, and photography. In real life, she's a CPA, but having grown up with art all around her (her mother, grandmother and great-grandmother are/were all artists), it sort of infected her, as it were. She wants to expose the incredible beauty in this world, hidden beneath the everyday grime of familiarity and habit, and share it with others. She uses characters out of time and places infused with magic and myth. Combine this love of beauty with a bit of financial sense and you get an art business. She does local art and craft shows, as well as sending her art to various science fiction conventions throughout the country and abroad. Facebook: www.facebook.com/greendragonauthor Homepage: www.greendragonartist.com Blog: www.greendragonartist.net Twitter: www.twitter.com/greendragon9

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